million dollar saving
a poem by  
  keith  o'connor
faces: by  keith o'connor ...  
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Note how the objective has changed by the time you reach the end of the poem.
 
. Poems about Government Bureaucrats 

million dollar saving 

PART I 

we have reviewed 
your proposal 
and this is what you write 
... 
you can save 
a million dollars 
from future staffing costs 
by making some of our clients 
wait longer 
and others of our clients 
wait  less 
... 
it is only fair 
you write 
that each of our clients 
wait the same length of time 
 for our service 
and this you write will save 
a million dollars 
from  future staffing costs 
... 
yes 
my system will save a million dollars 
from future staffing costs 
because it makes efficient use 
of existing staff 
through real time staff scheduling 
which tell's us how many staff should be serving 
every minute of the day 
and 
in real time client wait scheduling 
we have a staff member 
in the back 
at a computer  
 moving the clients 
ticket numbers around 
to different servers 
so 
it no longer matters  
if they have a three minute service need 
or a fifteen minute service need 
by moving them to different servers 
all clients wait the same length of time 
... 
when a client  complains that  
someone who came in after them 
gets served before them 
we say  
the computer is balancing the wait time 
such that - the wait time  
is no longer a matter of random luck 
and everyone's wait is fair 
... 
the system has a  precedent 
in American  
government use 
to equalize their client waiting time 
no problems have they encountered 
and suggest we do the same 
... 
 to implement my proposal 
we need 
a million dollar system 
excluding annual maintenance costs 
nothing more nothing less 
... 
we agree with 
your proposal 
you may implement 
your system 

PART II  

our million dollar system 
is working very well 
I notice that we need 
two  new 
statistics specialists 
whose salary will cost more 
since I have more specialist responsibility 
my salary will cost more 
we  will also need 
one extra employee 
in each of  the large offices 
because 
the manager has no 
time to sit all day at a computer 
and move the client  
ticket numbers around 
adding fairness 
to the client waiting time 
... 
yes  
we'll have to raise our fees 
this extra cost is minimal 
when compared to 
benefits  
that will accrue 
 from 
government client satisfaction 
... 
every client is a waiting voter 
and 
every voter is a waiting client 
we must treat them fairly 
as 
 happy voters 
and  
happy clients 
do 
happy  governments  make 
... 

Keith O'Connor 
Aug 1 2001 
Ottawa Canada 
www.tinmangallery.com 

 

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